Ghost

I wonder if there is a job that fits my needs somewhere… My remit:

A job where I can use my intelligence (the stuff I was born with AND the stuff I learned a long the way)

Where I can manage my own workload yet still be part of a team that I see during the week. Don’t much mind if the team is a big one and I don’t get to see the same people EVERY day, long as it’s the some regular faces to say good morning to and discuss work challenges/successes.

Where managing my own workload means if I work smarter and more efficiently, I get to work slightly less hours.

However, I also want to be able to go to work, do my work, and come home again. if I have an appointment one day and need to rush, I don’t want to be questioned. I don’t want to be required to sit around in a group and do mindfulness activities or group yoga if I don’t want to. That’s not to say I wouldn’t otherwise enjoy yoga, or that sometimes chances to be a family and a team are beneficial. I just don’t want to be required to attend.

I want to be able to turn to my boss and say ‘there isn’t time for that task’, when it isn’t. And for my boss to believe me because I’m a professional. I don’t mind my wage being calculated based upon the tasks I complete. Although I fear, if this became a thing, in most sectors, tasks would suddenly cost very little and you’d have to do more of them to get a decent wage.

Which leads me to the last piece of the puzzle… A semi decent wage. 2 grand a month should do it. I can pay my share of the house bills, eat well, get a wax regularly, keep me car going, go out for coffee, go out for drinks, buy the odd new item of clothing, go out and about and see the world, even if I can’t always go out of the country. I don’t fritter away my money, only stuff to keep me going. Yet many full time wages wouldn’t support my lifestyle.

And therein lays my issue.

My experience of working so far is that jobs require your everything. I’m happy to offer my brain. My brain has worked hard to learn concepts, ideas, strategies for things etc. The job can have my brain for the time it requires me to do the task given. Then the job can get to fuck. I have a life. I have friends. I have a social life, a niche in the world. Extra work activities just eat into this and I’m already tired.

The wage is only enough if you get it. Recently I saw something published about a marriage tax relief if you don’t work and your partner earns under 40k. I find this to be a pointless offer, they’ve aimed it well. The likelihood of a couple opting for one parent to stay at home when the other earns 40k or less, is slim. 40k isn’t much. For my 2k per month, I have no aspirations of a decent car or designer shoes yet many hard worker bees strive to accumulate these things. They would be left less than disappointed when the wallpaper is peeling off the walls onto their 40 pair collection of Jimmy choos.

Is there a job out there for me? Or do I have to sacrifice something… I feel the sacrifice I’ll end up making will be the team. I’ll end up working in solitary to avoid the other requirements being eaten into.

Shame. I didn’t think I was asking for much.