I can relate…

I missed out on tv as a teen/early twenties. I was always out always socialising. People in recent times have made realise how and why I didn’t have close friendships.

I had a number of interesting experiences but once I’d inundated people with my tales of my life, I had no idea how to formulate normal functional relationships with people.

I also had different friends all the time. I didn’t have the type of friends you went for coffee with every week or turned up at their houses unannounced because you were known and trusted.

I had the type of friends that allowed me not to get too close. Friends who had other lives. I’d move from friend group to friend group seeing the same person for a few weeks or months or even sometimes years. Then finding another friend.

I’d regale them with my exploits. The would be understandably enthralled. They would be intruiged and interested and ask questions and discus the moral, legal and societal implications.

It all felt so intense and it was.

But once the intensity had died down. What was left? I’d built no connections to these people. I was a ray of strange madness in their otherwise placid grey world.

I would go away and they would carry on with their normal lives. didn’t have time to keep up any daily contact as I was busy amusing others with the same life stories.

It was a lonely place to be.

Now I have official friendships. Ones where I have learned what communication is all about. And how to form proper friendships, proper connections with people. How to keep them up too. I put time aside for people, ask them about the mundane things that life involves for everyone. I don’t feel the need to tell them all my stories straight away. I talk about the mundanity of my own life. People lke that. They like hearing about parts of my life are similar to theirs. They like knowing I have some of the same worries as them.

Yes my friendships keep moving, but im collecting more long term friends along the way and I’m learning better how to keep them. They keep coming back into my life and keep giving me companionship when I’m around.

I’m also watching TV more. Which gives me things in common to talk to people about. I’ve got games and a youtube account that I keep up together that people are interested in.

I don’t just wow people with my escapades in life, letting them be intimidated. I relate to people more.