Bitterness

I am bitter. I hate my job. I love the job itself, just the people. I hate the people. I wouldn’t hate them so much if they just kept away. They can carry on being people I don’t like, but in another room, another universe. But no. They have to bring their unlikeableness to my door, to my world.

I have just tried 4 times to write down what happened in school the other day. But the unfairness just makes me want to vomit.

I hate the people. I’ve tried to fit in. Correction. I’ve tried hard not to not fit in. I don’t see why I can’t just go to work then go home again. Why do people have to question me all the time? Other people don’t get questioned.

It’s a good thing I’m not going to be there much longer. If I stayed I would end up so bitter towards teaching. I don’t want to feel bitter about teaching. I want to feel valued and I don’t. They don’t even know me. I’m glad they don’t. I mean, if they did, I wouldn’t have a job. There’s a reason they don’t know me and that has everything to do with how I spend my free time and what I’ve experienced in life. But for some reason, not knowing me is really not okay with these people.

This is left to be misunderstood for the moment. I haven’t the energy to comprehend all of it.